Hair! Don’t care, Commit to something

I am a long hair.  I will just put this out there now.  I have nothing against short haired women.  Rock that hawk!  Or whatever. But seriously please stop trying to convince me that I should cut my hair. This is in response to an article I just read entitled “Why girls who cut their hair are actually cutting off so much more.”1. Actually this is not the first (or the second or even third) time I’ve heard this ode to the chop.  I don’t know why people are trying to convince others that such a drastic change is a good idea. Why does almost every makeover article I read include something to the effect of  “we lopped off 7 inches of her hair”.  Really that’s what passes for creativity?  With 24 inches of keratin, there’s no other way to show creativity that doesn’t involve a hair cut that looks great out of the salon but will eventually devolve into every other short to mid-length style? 

“When a woman cuts her hair she is cutting off so much more: she’s cutting herself off from the societal standard of beauty.”1.  What about her own standard of beauty?  Are you telling me the statement “I don’t give a damn what you think” can only be made by shaving ones head? I very seriously doubt a woman cutting off her hair in the heat of the moment over a heart break is thinking about flipping society the bird. What of the aftermath?  In one instant one can  destroy something that took years to build.  Just because one relationship failed and was completely destroyed does not mean  you should destroy your hair thinking you will “wash your lover out of your hair”.  Oh, good. How’s your heart, did that heal it? And do you like what you see when you catch a glimpse in the mirror? How many long hairs that betrayed themselves over some of this hokey non-sense desperately regretted it later? I’ve seen it on my social media feeds, the same story. “I am so psyched, getting all this hair cut off! Time for a change.”  I keep my keyboard shut. I know.  Three to six months later, “I miss my long hair, I can’t wait until it grows back out.” “Should I get extensions?”  Eyeroll! 

You are so high maintenance

Oh people that rock short hair are so much less maintenance.  As in not a high maintenance brat that annoys everyone around them with their grooming habits.  Um excuse me? So you are trying to sell me the short hair requires no maintenance line?  I have one word for you: pomade.  That stuff isn’t made with us long hairs in mind.  Are we really forgetting the obligatory 4-6 week hair cut at $10---$70+ a pop? So if it’s only $10 good for you, I guess.  I’ve had enough experience to know you do get what you pay for.  Not to mention hair is only one variable in a person’s beauty routine.  Some might have to have a mani/pedi every week.  No maintenance there?  Sorry but you can’t judge a person’s level of over-all bratty--ness on hair alone. Oh and one more thing: if someone insists you are high maintenance you might want to check their worth/value in your life.  High maintenance is rarely meant as a compliment and much of the time the person hurling the insult is simply not up to whatever it is that was asked of them. 

I heard that women in one particular region of the free world cut their hair to their ears when they turn 30.  What’s up with the whole middle age women can’t have long hair? Haters gonna hate! Can we apply some logic to this though?  If all 30 year old women cut their hair to their ears is that not conforming to societies standards????? I don’t see articles compelling short hairs to grow their hair out, they’re more like in defense of  the choice to have long hair. Yes, any query into an engine about growing your hair longer, stronger, faster can yield pages of false information; but I have yet to run across a Twitter or Facebook link to an article about why you should grow your hair out if you normally rock the short ‘n’sassy do. That’s not what this is either.    
 
Do you know what you get when you pray for patience? Something to wait for!    

In the eighties when I was growing up there was a doll called Pretty cut n’ grow.  It allowed you to cut the doll’s hair and tug on in to “grow” it again.  Wouldn’t it be great if hair was like that? If you didn’t have wait for what you want? If you could have it up to your ears one day and pull it down to your waist the next? Well ya can’t! And if you could it wouldn’t be as precious. That it takes roughly 4-6 years to grow waist length hair starting from one's shoulders is reason enough to give one pause before making such an extreme change. 

I’ve heard it’s very liberating to cut or even shave one’s head a la Britney Spears 2007.  I bet giving up and not caring is damned liberating. Regardless of starting length, if you considered your hair an annoying factor in a personal maintenance routine and decided you were done dealing with it, done caring about that part of your appearance so much so you are willing to “lop it all off” if that’s what you feel  in your heart, DO IT!!!!  I once spoke to a woman at length about her grooming habits.  After she brought up that it was Thursday and needed to shave her head I asked her why. She told me “hair is a bit of a nuisance really, I only wear a wig when I’m working to satisfy society’s norms.”  My immediate thought was “I love you.  I love you for being so totally opposite of me, that is just so cool.”  She shaved her head every Thursday. 

Long hair is not merely a symbol of conforming to “societies standards”  of sexy but if long hair is considered sexy instead of blindly rebelling against that [because being sexy is so wrong! how dare we women be okay with and even desire an approving male gaze! You morally challenged harlot!] why not think about the possible reasoning behind it. Long hair (and yes the longer the “better”) is an outer demonstration of a level of commitment.  Guess what, commitment is sexy! Yes I said it. Commitment is sexy.   Long hair says, “I won’t quit, I won’t give up on what I want just because it’s not so easily achieved. Thin wispy from abuse and mistakes like permanent waiving and coloring (pick 1!) ….It’ll grow. In the meantime find another way to style your hair, do you have any idea how many different tools there are? The stubborn focus on the end result is more likely to yield desired results than getting bogged down in naysayer’s hot air. 

Commitment you say??? That mean loss of freedom!  Well, okay. Maybe you need to redefine freedom. I know I did because there are certainly varying degrees of freedom . "Freedom’s just another word for nothin’ left to lose.” I will not go into all the ways that freedom really takes commitment but I will say that any loss of so-called freedom due to commitment just might be outweighed the end result.  The most dangerous people aren’t really the ones with nothing to lose, the ones you have to watch out for are the ones who have gotten everything, lost it, then gotten it back again. You cannot do this without commitment.  This is why longhairs who have been shorn by either their own hands or their parents’ that grew it back are very protective of it’s length. Real change takes commitment. That post-whatever weight you want to lose? Probably not going to lose it if you keep doing what you’ve been doing. Commitment to change and an exercise program might get you there.

I could never imagine feeling like hair was a nuisance like my work associate who was committed to shaving once a week.  Isn’t that what makes the world go ‘round ? With the latest ruling here in the states appropriately titled marriage equality granting everyone the right to be just as blissfully wedded as their neighbor, it’s becoming more and more clear that there is more than one way to do life. Some people want to cut their hair off, some want to grow their hair to the sky. So, do you--but commit to it, whatever it is. And remember our differences and our ability to not merely tolerate them but celebrate them are what makes life worth living. 

1. http://elitedaily.com/women/girls-cut-hair-cut-off-more/1039658/__